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Mar. 27th, 2009

Sleeping with james has once again become a strange new thing. I will often partly wake during periods throughout my nightly nightmares terrified and confused with the feeling of screams at the back of my throat. But when I am with him I will wake only to find that there is a strange masculine body, I can tell by the smell, next to me with his arms wrapped around me and holding me tight. And though I am frightened, I will bury my face in his chest, knowing that this place is safe and that while I don't know who he is, I do know this stranger will take care of me and that I love him for it. So I will snuggle in closer and mumble that I love him while I drift back into that place of unremembered terror again.

And oh how I miss it when he is gone.