Log in

No account? Create an account

Previous Entry | Next Entry

Writer's Block: It's Too Late to Apologize

Has anyone ever done something so horrible to you that "I'm sorry" couldn't fix it?
I wanted to say no, but then I remembered 'that bitch.' She doesn't have a name anymore because of what she did.

I was engaged, she knew it, and she fucked my fiancee and basically broke everything up. I could have forgiven her though, had she not mentioned him as being her first 'real love' and basically rubbing it in my face. I told her if she wanted my fucking forgiveness she would have to take the time out to get it, and she didn't, which tells me that she didn't really want it. And I don't really give a shit either way. She is a fucking slut and is paying for what she did to me. She has the worst life and her 'fiancee' cheats on her at every turn.

If I like and know you (physically) don't cross me. :) The demon curses without second thought. I can't control it and right now I'm sitting right in the middle of human and demon. Shhh, this is the part of me you wish you had never met.



( 3 comments — Leave a comment )
(Deleted comment)
May. 10th, 2008 08:11 am (UTC)
She deserves everything she gets and karma is a bitch. :)
May. 8th, 2008 02:05 pm (UTC)
Oh shit, did I really click this link from this journal?
I don't do witchcraft myself, because as powerful as my latent healing powers seem to be (I apparently do it in my sleep, both to this body and any body being currently held favorably by the majority voting members of the body, but I can't do it worth a damn if I'm awake and actively trying - I'm more likely to do harm that way!)

But anyway, this body is born purely Dark Moon, and you seem to be born either early New Moon or late phases of Dark Moon. Most wicca and witchcraft books say to never ever do magic on those nights, but what's a soul to do when they hit their highest personal power then? I knew there was something other than physical closeness that drew me to you when I met you on that SI comm! Dark Moon born is a very dangerous gift. Even when you just think bad thoughts about someone, it tends to stick like a fully crafted curse, and even if you try the purest pure "good" spell or prayer, it will have a negative backlash, somewhere, some time. (This body is currently recovering from asking the backlash to come back here from about 2 1/2 years ago.)

I have found no knowledgable source about how to fully deal with this without doing harm in any way, but this body's got enough bad exes and bad mother still alive (She had a stroke and has permanent "lattice vision" in one eye from last time she did us wrong; can't drive more than short distances anymore, and I refuse to feel guilty about it, because she goes on and on about my tattoes, piercings, and clearly obvious hair colors while she's standing there with her padded pushup bras and control-top nylons and gray-roots-dyed dark brown hair. Hey, at least I'm open and obvious about being unnatural, and I'm fully fine with myself for it!)

Anyway, you look like you're slightly more "bright moon" born, but you're close enough to total Dark Moon, and what you wrote about happening to some one that, as far as you've said, you didn't cast an actual curse, but you had strongly negative feelings toward, you might have the full "curse" power, even when you don't quite mean it.

I fully support people who have done wrong getting what's due to them, but just make sure you don't have any extra animosity hanging around, because it can come back on those that you care about, whether that be friends, family, or even co-workers. (I think you've read about stuff happenning to my co-workers. There's been a couple of "runner-type" thefts beyond the actual physical threat to my head manager, and this is NOT normal around there, but I've walked in more than once feeling threatened by or remambering that my ex-bf stole from me, and it does carry a current.

No, I don't use the "witchgifts" myself, but I know that they're there, and I see stuff happen around me. So yeah, word of caution: you might be packing more power than you know. While I think you were in the right in past situation, it's still probably a good idea to sets limits on how far you let your hatred/curses go, because if they go TOO far, they will come back on you and your loved ones even harder. I don't even fully believe in witchcraft myself, but I do think caught the full backlash brunt of what some of my "sisters and brothers" have done/cast without thinking, because I've never dealt with anything but an uphill battle where all the cards were against me. That's a big part of why I don't do magic/witchcraft myself - physical world fuckups are far easier to deal with than magic/spiritual ones!

Um, I maybe shouldn't have made this reply, or should have made it more brief. That lacking, I'll just admit it was you I was dreaming of in that dream I recently mentioned from a couple of months ago, and I didn't give much detail and "wrote it off" it's not that I'm not interested, it's that I kind of figured I didn't have a chance.

That's more than I meant to say, but I don't believe in take-backs unless it's just rewording, so let it stand.

- Troy
May. 10th, 2008 10:17 am (UTC)
Yup, you did.
I refuse to practice any intentional magic. In the past I did have an interest in it until I found out all that I have about myself. I have a part demon that has her own little personality going on, part faery from my mom (ew, half-breed), and when I was pregnant for that short period it was with a crystal, so I know there is more than enough magic running through me and really have no interest in the blacklash any intentional stuff would bring. There is also no real anger left towards her anymore as it burned it's self out long ago, other than a little flare up when she last tried to contact me. She was asking for forgiveness that she refused to earn. I'm actually happy what happened, happened. I was young, stupid and that relationship would have ended up being a VERY bad thing. Being young and stupid though I didn't know it at the time. Now I get the better life, know tons of awesome people, wouldn't change any of it for the world and had 5 years to come to burn him fully out of my blood and come that realization before he tried contacting me again. I still won't take back anything though. She is a liar, a thief and liked to pretend to be a witch and now her ass is burning for it while I get to sit back and giggle.

And I was born during a waxing crecent if that helps you any. Depending on what you ask it was mid to late first quarter. Thank you for the advice and warnings, I will keep it around and in mind. :) *hugs*

/I'm also sure that's less than I want to say but I'm rather tired at this point so I have to shorten it up.

Edited at 2008-05-10 10:17 am (UTC)
( 3 comments — Leave a comment )