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I hate this

Mom brought up some shit today while she was in counseling with me that in NO way needed to be mentioned... EVER. Like the little incident with the knife that happened when brianna spent the night. Actually there were a couple, and that child should be smacked stupid for being such a liar, but the other thing I've got nothing to do with. Anyway, that all got me to be pretty upset and depressed afterwards. I feel like I am totally powerless and I have no control over anything in my life right now. Like a marionette. I don't even know why I'm still living at home, other than the fact that I have no where else to go... :'( God shoot me now. I'm so depressed that I can't think and I'm eating to fill the void. If you don't know me that's REALLY fucking depressed. Normally I forget to eat when I'm upset, so when this all started a couple weeks ago I thought it was something else going on that I didn't want to know about. It's not though, I started spotting yesterday thanks to layton and the fact that he absolutly can NOT keep his hands to himself. :) This is the last week and then I get to go have my period again for the first time in 8+ weeks after I go down to the clinic and get more nuva rings. Maybe that's one of the things contributing to my sadness. Fuck, I don't know, and I really don't think I care much either. Too fucking tired to care for shit. I just wanna see someone who can make me happy again.