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If I only had a brain

Yeah, so how bad does life suck for everyone? Probably not so bad for layton. Seems life is never really terribly bad for him. He's lucky and I envy that.

Been pretty depressed today. Finley's rat bit me really hard, tore off skin. Sleep is crap. Same complaints, just another day. James called earlier. His dad was yelling at him over something. Asked but he didn't want to elaborate. I didn't know what to say or do. Wanted to say something... but nothing was coming out. Made me feel even worse and more worthless.

No one ever really wants to hear when you're upset. Not when you get like that a lot. They may say that they do in the beginning, but after awhile it just wears on. They say, call me if you're upset, but I don't think I know anyone who REALLY means it. Not in the end. Eventually it just gets annoying. Yeah, you're depressed. Big fucking deal. Why don't you just get over it already? If it's not life and death, why the hell would you call someone in the middle of the night. Have to wait for them to have the free time to talk. So it ends up no one is ever really around. People stop calling. Tell you to get over it. In the end, no one ever really means anything. And in the end it all ends up in the worst place possible. Still inside yourself.

And all you ever wanted was a shoulder to cry on. That's all I want.

Don't know why I have to be like this. Why everything alway hurts. I try and be positive, help other people... and... I always fuck up and end up feeling more terrible than when I've locked myself away. What is the point in trying? No one wants me around.

Picture of the day: Assaulted 02