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The more I think about it, the more I think james may be right. Maybe it would do me better to go to my mom's for a few days. Just leave with leon and not tell anyone. Can't hurt me right? Not any more than I have been I'd hope.

I've been hurting a lot. I've been trying terribly hard to get along with layton and not have him do anything that he wouldn't want to, but he's still angry at me over every little thing. Last night I asked him if he could help me come up with a plan for meals. You wouldn't think it would be such a big deal but he blew up at me and I told him I'm sorry and that I had never wanted this to turn into one of those bitter break-ups and took leon upstairs to james' room where I cried. I don't know what I've been doing wrong. James called me later and woke me out of the half-sleep I was in. I talk, or cried rather, to him a bit. He told me I should just stay away from layton. Stay upstairs in his room or other things when layton is home. I told him I just want out since layton doesn't want me or any of my things around.

He even harbors resentment towards leon and simon. Got upset about a rib falling on the carpet and having fuzz on it when he picked it up last night. Let's ignore the fact that the carpet is made of carpet fibers and blame it wholly on the dog. Moved the dog food and water to where my blue chair used to sit, since I deflated it, layton was upset about that even when I explained why. Don't know why I bother.

I haven't been able to stop crying since then and don't know what to do. I can't leave and I can't stay.

Every time I've brought things down, ask, suggest or comment on something he gets so upset. Like clockwork. Tick. Tick. Tick. I recall when I commented to james on how my parents were getting rid of their old kitchen table. He wanted it because kitchen tables are expensive. When layton found out he got so angry, yelling about how he doesn't get why I have to bring all this crap down here, like it was my idea. I told him that james was the one who wanted it, not me but that didn't change his opinion any. We didn't end up taking it, it was too weather-worn from sitting outside and I'm sure that made layton happy. He never wanted any of my things here. I would ask if he wanted something since my parents were getting rid of it or it was outside in the dumpster and it was always a flat out no. I could go back to the beginning and point out things. Not my computer desk, never the dressers, not the bookshelf or chairs. None of it. James has thought that they would be good ideas, layton doesn't care. If it involves me or an idea I have, he wants nothing to do with it.

I don't understand.

I try so hard to accommodate him and make him happy while making this place pleasant and livable but it doesn't matter what I do. I'm always wrong in the end. Like clockwork.

Maybe I should just do what james said and leave until everything calms down.